The other day a cop shot a cougar in Kearney, a bit east of its usual habitat. Troubling. Worse, the government's hiding news that a sheriff strangled a charging koala in an Omaha yard and another pistol-whipped a rabid giraffe in a KC barbecue joint. I didn't want to believe all this unusual animal movement was a sign of the Apocalypse (May 21, people; get your sh** together), but then my hamster turned up in Niger.