Birds falling from the sky and fish going belly up in rivers (and, in unconfirmed reports, vice versa!), Favre retiring, an Oompa-Loompa becoming House speaker, McDonald’s serving oatmeal, Watson staying at NU, Gov. Moonbeam back, Keyser Soze’s right-hand man suddenly dying. That’s it, I’m rounding up the weapons, canned food and family and heading for my survivalist compound in the Sandhills. End Times are upon us.